Leadership involves risk, making hard decisions and navigating uncertainty. If you lead, you will experience failure. It's going to happen. How you respond will have a significant impact on you and your team.

In 2009, I took a new leadership role. Two teams were being combined, and I was asked to lead the newly formed team. The twist though was that the two leaders of each of the previous teams were still on the team. They were each older and more experienced than me. And here I was, as a young leader coming in to guide the team into a much larger scope than the two teams previously had combined.

My Two Fears

I was excited about what was possible, but I felt anxious about something. I spent time reflecting and trying to name what I was feeling. I identified two fears:

1. I would break what I had been given. I inherited a lot from these two teams, and I didn't want it to fall apart under my leadership, especially with the two other leaders watching.
2. My team would mutiny. I knew I could do the job but didn't feel qualified. We lived in Asia, and most of the people on my team had more experience and better language skills. I was afraid they would not see me as qualified and question why I was leading.

With this clarity, I took a long walk to pray about these failures. As I was processing what I was feeling, I felt like God said, "If both of the failures are fully realized, will I still be enough for you?" I was hoping for assurance that these wouldn't happen, that I would be safe from my fears. Instead, I was asked if I thought I would be safe amidst my fears realized.

I knew that even if my fears were realized, God would be enough. But I was struggling to have confidence and embrace this reality. I allowed my imagination to wander into what it might look like if those fears were realized. It wasn't fun. However, as I continued walking, imagining these failed outcomes, I could say, "God, I don't want this to happen, but if it does, I believe you will be enough."

Hope that transcends circumstance frees you from living under a fear of failure.  

At the end of that walk, I felt tired yet hopeful.

A practice of envisioning failure

Fear of failure can paralyze some, trapping them in decision paralysis amidst uncertainty. For others, it can drive them to control for self-protection.

Take some time to reflect, and I asked, "As a leader, what am I afraid of?" Consider what fears lurk in the back of your mind. Write them down.

Just naming your fears, it a significant first step to disarming them. But I want to take it a step further.

Consider if your fears were fully realized in an all-out catastrophe kind of way. In a sense, answer the question, "What's the worst that could happen?" This exercise may not be fun, but it's necessary. Now ask the question, "If I fail, where will I find hope?" Hope that transcends circumstance frees you from living under a fear of failure.

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What if I do fail?

That next year leading the new team went well. We built upon what was already established. I empowered the previous two leaders to take significant ownership, honoring their abilities and experience.

But in the coming years, I would actually experience each of those fear realized in one way or another. It was painful. There's no way around it. I bore responsibility for much of it while, at the same time, much of it was out of my control.

If your lead, you will at times experience failure. It's going to happen. How you respond will have a significant impact on you and your team.

It wasn't easy, but strength and resolve came from already envisioning these fears realized. It's as if I had the benefit of already experiencing them in the past. I was confident God would be enough for me amid the difficulties, and I was not afraid.

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The book "Leading with a Limp" was very formative for me this season. How I responded to failures had and powerful impact on my team. They had a front-row seat to the show. I had a choice. I could hide my weakness unsuccessfully or be transparent and lead through my weakness.

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See the opportunities

As a leader, it's tempting to try to appear strong and act like we have all the answers. It's not true, and everyone can see through it. You can your team are better together. Having a more experienced team is a blessing if you have the humility to embrace it. Humility, however, doesn't often come without humiliation. While embracing your failures can be scary and painful, it can also chart a course to growth and healthy leadership.